I used to overthink things when it came to my daughter.
Everything from deciding on which shoes to buy her for school, to picking out a lunchbox could turn into a multi-hour ordeal that causes both her and me unnecessary stress.
In some extreme cases, it could missing out altogether because it took me way too long to make up my mind.
One Halloween, I went to at least 8 different stores trying to find a costume for her.
I drove myself completely crazy trying to figure out which ensemble she would love the most, that would not be insulting to any cultural groups and that would empower her.
Tall order for one kindergarten size costume, right?
In fact, I ended up purchasing 2 different costumes and making another because I just couldn’t choose.
The thing about my daughter is that she’s always been easy to please.
She’s so grateful for everything that I give her, and it really doesn’t take much to make her happy.
She loved the first Halloween costume that I purchased, and the second one as well.
She was also over the moon about the costume that my husband and I put together in 10 minutes before leaving for an event.
All of that overthinking? It was me.
I want to be a good mom.
Growing up, my parents did the best when it came to taking care of my social-emotional needs.
There was a lot about me that they just didn’t get, though.
I’m so different from both of them that often their idea of what was cool wasn’t at all what I liked.
I ended up spending many years being uncomfortable in clothes, shoes, and yes, Halloween costumes, that they bought and liked that didn’t suit me at all.
I always knew I was going to give my kids a different experience.
You know what I realized? My kids will have a different experience.
I’m not my parents, and the relationship that I have with my kids is unique and special to us. I don’t have to stress out about making sure they’re happy.
Parenting isn’t supposed to be easy, but things like picking out a Halloween costume shouldn’t make us crazy.
Children don’t ask for much, and they’re much more flexible and understanding than we give them credit for.
If you care enough to worry about whether or not your child is happy, or is having fun, you’re already a great mom.
We need that reminder as parents, though.
I needed someone to say it to me, and so I’m saying it now to you: You’re doing just fine.
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