I don’t take a lot of selfies. I can never seem to get the angle right, and on the occasions when I do, my skin looks bad, or my hair is a mess, or the picture is just off. Besides, it’s just so much easier to take pictures of Ayva and Terrence. They’re always camera ready. It really didn’t matter if I was in photographs or not anyway. I mean, who cares, right? I know I’m a blogger, and I talk an awfully lot about myself, but believe it or not, I’m totally okay with not being in the spotlight, or having my face showing up on everyone’s Instagram feed. I’ve always been like, automatically falling to the back in group pictures, trying to fade into the background, and not get in anyone’s way. Something changed for me this Christmas, though.
This Christmas, like every Christmas, we took a ton of pictures. When I uploaded the pictures to the computer, I was surprised to find that there were plenty of Terrence, tons of Ayva, and a bunch of them together. We had some good shots of my in-laws, and a few of my in-laws with Terrence and Ayva. The photos of me that we had were blurry or dark, and in one of them, half of my face was covered by a shadow. I don’t blame Terrence. He’s not constantly being educated on the importance of light and depth of field and all of that like I am, but I was still sad. I was there, you know? I’m a part of the family, too. You wouldn’t know it to look through the pictures, though.
Earlier in December, when my stepmother passed away, we spent time going through all of her pictures and photo albums. She had photos of everyone. My sister, my Dad, and me. There were cousins on both sides, and people we didn’t know, high school classmates, old co-workers and neighbors from all of the places she used to live. As we looked at the pictures, it gave all of us a bit of peace to be able to have tangible evidence that my stepmother lived a full, diverse life surrounded by people who loved her.
After looking at the Christmas photographs, I made the decision that I’m going to start insisting that I’m in pictures, and that the pictures I’m in are good. When we’re on vacation, I’m going to ask strangers if they would mind getting a shot of the entire family, and I’m not going to be ashamed to ask them to take a couple, you know, just in case. It’s not about being vain. It’s about creating memories for myself and my family. And also because after I’m gone, I want folks to know that I was here. You know what else? I’m going to work on my selfie game, too, because right now, I am here, and darn it, all of the folks on Instagram are going to know it!
I’m linking up with Mimi and LaShawn for the photography challenge, #OurProject52. This week’s theme is “Who Are You?”. I took the first picture with my tripod and 50 mm lens on a timer. Ayva took the bottom photo, also using the tripod and the same lens.
You look so pretty!!! I love it! I had a long stretch where I wasn’t in ANY photos at all. Because I was always the one taking them. It was my son who pointed out to me that there were not that many photos of he and I. Last year I made a conscious decision to GET IN THE PHOTO! And now I can’t stop. LOL
Yes! Our children notice those things! I’m going to be like you soon, in those shots! Looking forward to this challenge! THanks so much for hosting!
This post spoke to me. I feel this exact same way. I’m always taking pictures of my family and I don’t always include myself. I am going to take your advice and start asking strangers to take group shots. You are here and you’re beautiful. I love your hair and the scarf in your photo. Looking forward to seeing all of the photos you share this year!
Thank you so much, Tia! I really appreciate the compliments, and YES…ask the strangers, because YOU ARE HERE, TOO!!!
I absolutely love this! Such an important step for you and your family. I wish that I’d come to that realization before my kids were all teenagers and/or out of the house. So, yes, get all up in those pictures and smile your beautiful smile!
Thank you, Daenel! I’m going to do better. This project certainly helps!
This is a beautiful photo of you. When my mother died I realized that I have very few pictures of her and I together as an adult. I to have to do better with this. I take so many of my children and I am not in many of them. I think with practice comes perfection when it comes to getting in the shot. I’m sure our babies will want photos of us together for memories.
Thank you so much, Mimi! Yes, they’ll want the memories. I’m not holding back anymore!