Every Waking Moment Doesn’t Need To Be Blogged

Every Waking Moment Doesn't Need To Be Blogged.

Anybody that knows Ayva and me know that we love being on the move! From the time she was a tiny baby up to now, she’s been my roadie for the last few years. Once I started blogging and writing about our adventures, forget about it. We were up and down the road creating blog-worthy experiences and pinnable moments. I feel incredibly blessed for the opportunities that we’ve been able to have because of my work, and they have really enhanced our lives.

You know what, though? Every mom moment doesn’t have to be blogged. Last night, Terrence had to work late and Ayva and I were able to get some quality girl time in. I caught up on her life with some lively conversation, put together puzzles, and discovered more about the type of houses that children around the world live in thanks to a new library book. The thing about last night that was different than many other nights of our Ayva/Mommy time is that I didn’t have the camera out, or my phone near to snap a pictures and post our time together on Instagram. (Of course, I am writing about it now. I’m a blogger. I can’t help myself.)

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Honestly, even more than wanting to record our times together to create a blog post, I worry about forgetting something. I mean, she’s growing up so quickly! Even though folks warned me, I had no idea these years would go by so fast.  Already, there are so many memories from when she was little that kind of sneak up on me when I’m not expecting it. Memories of sweet moments, or precious looks that made me melt as a new mom, and that still have the same effect now. I don’t want to lose any memories, y’all. So, I carry my camera everywhere I go, and have my phone in my hand on every outing.

Can I just tell you…it’s exhausting.

Yesterday, though, it was different. I decided to do quality time like they did it in the olden days. Sans expensive digital camera. Sans incredibly intelligent smart phone. Sans my Instagram followers and Facebook friends. Just Ayva and me. Y’all…she noticed. Ayva could tell that she had 100% of my focus, and she opened up even more than usual, and got comfortable because she didn’t have to be on for Mommy Paparazzi. She asked more questions, and was way more calm than usual, not even getting upset when we had a hard time putting together one of the more challenging puzzles.

When it was time for bedtime, because she had received all of the attention that she wanted and needed, she went without any complaint. Even when I realized I had sent her to bed too early (What can I say? I thought it was way later than 6!), she was content to stay in her bed, falling asleep in just a few minutes.

What lesson does this teach me? Every waking moment doesn’t need to be blogged. Sometimes I just need to be with Ayva. Turn everything off, clear my mind, and give my child the one thing that she needs the most—attention. Forget about Pinterest, forget about blog post pageviews, and put the quality back into quality time. And so what if ten years from now I forget about this one evening because there aren’t 60 pictures documenting it? Hopefully, twenty years from now, the memory will come back, out of nowhere, and make me smile.

26 responses to “Every Waking Moment Doesn’t Need To Be Blogged”

  1. RaisedByCulture Avatar

    I hear ya and I’m making an effort to stop! I actually tuned out yesterday when we were at Disneyland celebrating Omie’s 2nd Birthday and it was amazing.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      Oh, I bet it was amazing, @RaisedByCulture:disqus! Any time we’re able to be fully present in an experience AND make our kids happy? That’s a win/win!

  2. Heather Avatar

    Great point and good for you !! I have put the camera down more lately but still spending so much time connected. I need to get better. It mahes me sad!

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      Me, too, @disqus_3Sl9I9uteJ:disqus! I also notice that when I’m not engaged, my daughter starts acting out. That night, I was surprised that there were no issues at all! Quality time does work.

  3. Jessica F. Hinton Avatar

    Beautiful post, Brandi! I couldn’t agree more! After I changed my blog name, I had to change my blog focus. With more children, less time, priorities had to shift! It was hard to make this shift in the beginning, but now it’s my normal.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      @jessicafhinton:disqus That’s my goal, to make it my normal. You’re right, it’s about shifting priorities, and maybe shifting expectations of this blog and of social media….now you have me thinking!

  4. Alexandra Elizabeth Avatar
    Alexandra Elizabeth

    Kudos to you! I’m trying to lessen the time I’m using my phone or computer. I’m on a computer all day at work and when I get home I feel like I need to catch up on what I missed on social media…it’s exhausting! But being a blogger I feel like I have to keep up….but I’m realizing that it’s interfering with my being a Mommy and seeing as I’m a single mama I don’t have the balance of someone else to entertain and nurture my kiddo. She has me and I need to set the right example for her. And that means putting down the phone alot more. And honestly, I’m looking forward to it.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      I feel you, @alexandra_elizabeth:disqus! I’ve been looking at ways to automate more of the social media stuff. The evening seems to be the time that everyone comes out, but it’s also prime time for quality time. But, if have to choose…Ayva’s going to win every time.

  5. Keyonda Pyles Avatar
    Keyonda Pyles

    Great point. Thanks for sharing!

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      Thanks, @keyondapyles:disqus! I appreciate you reading!

  6. Rose's Daughter Avatar

    So true! Some memories are meant to live in our minds.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      Yes, @Rosesdaughter:disqus! It can be challenging to accept that, but our mothers and grandmothers did just find without photos of us every few seconds!

  7. Laila Avatar

    I think there is so much pressure (unintentional and intentional) for us to share everything all the time. There are so many mediums for us to share every moment of our lives. So much that we forget to live. I want to be present in each moment and how can I do that if I’m constantly trying to capture it with my camera?

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      That’s right, @disqus_maMio09mJA:disqus! If you didn’t put it on Instagram, did it really happen? And what about your readers? Well, it’s time our audience start to take a backseat and we focus on our children and the real time experience they’re having!

  8. kaicongroup Avatar

    All I need to say is Thank You. Beautifully written.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      Thank YOU, @kaicongroup:disqus!

  9. Janeane Davis Avatar
    Janeane Davis

    This was such a sweet post. I don’t blog about my personal life so I am blessed not to have that problem. I work at home and when I decided to work only when my kids were at school or asleep it made a big difference because when they see me, they know that I actually SEE them. Our children are precious and notice when we treat the like a treasure and when we treat then like a prop.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      Oooooh, @janeanedavis:disqus! You just said something there, “…when we treat them like a prop”. So true, and it stings because I’ve done that before. But, when you know better, you do better. I’m just grateful for the chance to improve!

  10. JanetGoingCrazy Avatar

    I have gotten so much into the quality time with my boy and my husband that they sometimes have to remind me that I might want to take a picture. I used to snap everything and now I only snap for my family and myself. If I can later use it in a blog post, then great! It’s hard to blog it all without all the pics, but I enjoy so much the time spent together that it’s worth it to me.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      Oh, Janet! That is really good that you’re able to get that quality time in! That’s what my goal is over the next few months. More engagement, less pictures!

  11. Alissa Boyle Avatar
    Alissa Boyle

    Beautiful post, Brandi. Some of my favorite moments are the ones without the camera/phone/etc. I’m getting better at unplugging and soaking in those moments, but like you, I worry about forgetting them myself. I just have to trust that those memories will live in my heart, even when they’re gone from my head – and I hope that will also be true for my kids. You’re right. I can tell a distinct difference when they’re “on” for the camera and when they’re just comfortably enjoying our quality time together.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      @alissaboyle:disqus Isn’t it funny how different the lives of “blogger kids” are compared to what life was like when WE grew up? There are so many perks, but yes, the unplugging becomes a fantastic chance to getaway (from the noise) and reconnect.

  12. Censie 'Mumby' Sawyer Avatar
    Censie 'Mumby' Sawyer

    Unplugging when a blogger is hard but so worth it. Beautiful post. Thank you for sharing!

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      It’s hard, but when we do it, the rewards are so much greater than anything blogging could ever give us. I keep reminding myself of that! <3

  13. Rachee Avatar

    This post. I find that I am trying to stage the perfect moment instead of letting it be. Love that you and Ayva are able to inspire me.

    1. BrandiJeter Avatar

      I am HUMBLED that we are able to inspire you. Thank you, @rungirl1:disqus!

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