Another Post About Influence Where Folks Will Probably Start Hating Me

You know how you struggle with yourself for awhile, going back and forth as to whether or not you’re going to write a post on a particular topic? And then you know how, after that post is written, you struggle again, trying to decide if you should publish it? That’s what I’m going through right now. I try to live a life that’s authentic, though, and I wouldn’t be genuine if I didn’t take a minute to share something that’s been weighing really heavily on my heart.

It’s not difficult to be nice. Well, okay, in some situations, it can be challenging to be nice. Maybe the person you’re trying to be nice to is an absolute douche. Maybe they’re a terrible human being who does hurtful things to others, or maybe they’re violent. For folks that aren’t any of the above, though, all it takes to be, at the very least, considerate, is to think about how you would want to be treated. 

Okay, here’s the deal. I was a part of an email chain yesterday where a PR rep made the (apparently) heinous and unforgivable mistake of not blind copying all of the recipients. One of the recipients, who is exhausted from all of the unsolicited, badly written pitches that aren’t suited to them wasn’t pleased at all, and proceeded to set the PR person straight…with the other hundreds of us on the email chain copied as witnesses. Whether the blogger was right or not, I wasn’t even concerned with that after seeing them humiliate the PR person in front of 300 people. 

Over a mistake.

Y’all, please help me understand what is going on in our blogging community. I know I’m just a lowly “mommy” blog. I don’t know the feeling of being bombarded with hundreds of emails a day (well, I’m starting to with my new job, ha!). I don’t have hundreds of thousands of followers, y’all know I have no influence and I’m not on any lists, but what is it, again, that we’re so entitled to? When did it become okay in our world, heck, in any world, to bully others who don’t approach us just so, or if they mess up, or if they just don’t know how to do something the way that it’s supposed to be done? Because of an unsolicited pitch? Hit delete. Email them separately and send them the link to one of the many posts that have been written about how PR folks should approach bloggers. 

Or ignore it.  

This influence that we have, this opportunity to speak our minds and actually have people hear us and listen to us and value what we say…this thing is a gift. The bigger we become, the more responsible we  have to be in the way that we use it. And don’t get me wrong, I’m not encouraging this because”You are a brand”, and brands are watching. Seriously, forget about that. You are a human being, and other people can be affected, negatively affected, by the way in which you choose to wield your power. What would you do if someone reamed you out in front of a huge group of folks who are (apparently) very important people…on your first day at work? Really, I want to know, what would you do? 

That example above…that’s just one incident. This post is meant to address an issue that is bigger than one person. Obviously I wouldn’t want none with that blogger anyway who is WAAAY bigger and more influential than me. They’d clobber me in an internet battle. I’m saying what I’m saying out of love. I am a blogger. I LOVE this gig. I’ve learned so much, and made so many real life friends doing this. I have no idea what my life would be like if I hadn’t started blogging 3 years ago. I owe it to this community, to my community, to speak up for the other side. Those of us who don’t want you O.G. bloggers* speaking for the masses if you’re not going to be nice about it. Those of us who are actually not that stressed out by spam, and actually kind of welcome meeting new people and learning about different opportunities, solicited or not.  I mean, as long as you aren’t showing up to my house without an invitation…we should be cool.

I don’t want to make any waves. I’m not trying to stir the pot. I like the way things are over here in my quiet little neck of the internet woods…nice and chill with me blogging about my daughter and buying jeans and stuff.  It just wouldn’t be right for me not to say anything. And if you don’t like it, don’t waste your precious time leaving a nasty message. Just delete. And smile. Because you know what? It really isn’t that deep.