There’s a new trend among married folks that I agree with completely. Instead of the “ol’ ball and chain” stereotype that used to define matrimony, men and women are treating marriage like a gift (because it is), and their spouses like a prize (because they are). Nowadays, wives aren’t belittling their husbands for laughs. I mean, some may try, but if they’re lucky, a sistergirl pulls them to the side real quick and sets them real straight. Sitcoms showing the long-suffering wife tolerating their bumbling husbands can sometimes trick women into thinking that disrespect is funny, and, that men are just species that you can’t live with and you can’t live without. We live in the real world, though. While one of those television husband’s reaction to snark and eye-rolling might be flowers and trying harder, your man probably won’t respond in the same way.
Now, I know none of you would dare treat your husband with anything less than total respect. I also know that despite the general feeling of reverence that you have for your man, life might prevent you from actually SAYING the things to let him know how much you care about him. As a newlywed, this is all new to me, too. I’ve never been big on expressing my feelings through words. My husband, on the other hand, he needs that to feel connected. So, I’ve been working to give him that. Once I started making the effort, because Terrence is pretty darn exceptional, it’s actually not that difficult.
1. I love you.
2. Thank you.
3. Have a good day.
4. How are you feeling?
5. I’m proud of you.
6. You look great.
7. I appreciate you.
8. You turn me on.
9. How was your day?
10. Do you need anything from me?
Of course, the way that you say these things to your man don’t have to be exact. This is list is just a place to start. For example, last week Terrence was doing a new eating plan and he stuck to it the entire week. Even though it meant that he had to miss out on his favorite food at a work outing, and he had to do a little bit more prep work, he made it through the end of the week and I was proud of him. Instead of keeping it in, I told him. “It’s been 5 days and you’ve done so good with your diet! That’s really fantastic that you’ve been able to keep up with things. I’m really proud of you! Is it getting easier? How do you feel?” Easy, right?
Ten simple phrases every single day. There’s 24 hours in the day, so that shouldn’t be a problem at all. Just get ready, though. Committing to affirming your husband every single day sows into your relationship, and you’ll reap the benefits. I feel like we’re communicating really clearly with each other because we’re both making an effort to acknowledge and recognize what each other is doing each day. The payoff for this tiny deposit into our relationship is incredible. Incredible.
How do you affirm your husband? Did it come easily to you, or did you have to work at it?